Let me go right to the truth.
I’ve been blogging for over four years now. And for probably 3.8 years I’ve felt as though I don’t have clarity over exactly what it is I do and what my message is and what exactly I want to change in the world. 3.8 years of constant questioning and constant doubt. 3.8 years of going through the same exercises, trying to always drill down to precisely what it is I want the world to hear from me.
It’s exhausted me at times; driven me insane at others. Maybe this is my message. Or maybe this. Or maybe it’s more this. And who do I want to work with? This sort of person or that sort of person?
It's been the thorn in my side for as long as I can remember. Until a few weeks ago, that is...
I was writing my journal one morning and felt a spontaneous desire to read some of my older musings. I went to the box where I keep my other notebooks and started reading one from April 2013 - about eight months after I first started blogging. Here’s some of what I read. This is word for word, so forgive the disjointed nature:
“What is this about?
Face your fears, follow your dreams, find your purpose, reach your potential.
Showing people that there is another way to live. What we’ve been taught is rubbish. We’ve been conditioned, lied to.
Help people create lives they love through believing nothing is impossible.
I want to reconnect with my rebellious, fiery nature (Aries).
A place for natural rebels to reconnect with their true nature."
And you know what?
It’s pretty much exactly the same as what I still write now, day in and day out.
It's about really getting that you can follow your heart. It's about knowing that the world needs you to do that. It's about knowing that creating a life you love and making a real impact is possible. It's about having fun, quitting the worry, and doing whatever calls. It's about waking up in the morning and doing what you love. It's about never giving up. It's about commitment. It's about seeing how far you can go because...why not?
It's about working with people who care. People who take risks. People who are both sensitive and empathetic but also rebellious and ballsy. People who are beginning to get that what they thought was real isn’t really real at all. Leaders. Creators. Change-makers.
The only thing that’s really changed?
The only thing that’s really changed is that my tagline used to be “believe in yourself and nothing is impossible” and now that feels a bit obsolete. You know, since I saw that the separate self doesn’t actually exist and all. Before it was all...you need to believe in yourself. And now it's all...erm, what self?
And that’s a pretty big change and it does impact so much of what I do and how I’m able to really support people now. My frame of reference and where I’m coming from is very, very different to four years ago.
But everything else?
Pretty much the same.
So the 3.8 years I’ve spent going round inside my own little hamster brain trying to get clarity?
A total waste of time.
I already had clarity. I just didn’t own it.
The point is this:
When you find yourself going round and round and round trying to get more clarity and tweaking your message and asking yourself the same questions and doing the same journaling exercises over and over again, have a look and find out:
Is it true that I need more clarity or is it just that I’m not ready to fully accept and own what I'm already actually clear on?
And maybe, just maybe, you’ll find like I did that you’re a hell of a lot clearer than you thought. Crystal clear, in fact. You know your message. You know your people. The only question is...
Are you ready to actually own it?
Love and courage,
Help get someone get off the clarity hamster wheel today. Tweet it out: You already have clarity. Now you just need to own it.