How to get better sleep: A journey into essential oils with Zane Zillner
The assumption that change is hard and takes time and effort is so deeply ingrained that it's not easy to believe it can be any other way. Our assumptions and beliefs are one of the most dangerous things we possess because they put a barrier between us and an easier, more peaceful, happier life. They shut us down to fresh thinking.
It's 5:30am and I'm getting dressed for another weekend trip to London. I look through my wardrobe, by which I mean I scan the several piles of folded clothes sitting on the bedroom floor because even though it's eight months since I moved into this place, I still haven't organised a space to hang my clothes, and I'm beginning not to care.
I wear the same thing, or the same small combination of things, almost every day. The black Nike leggings I bought in 2011 when I first started practising yoga are only just beginning to give out at the knees. They're easy and comfortable and...safe.
That's what I think as I mentally turn the pages on what I might wear today. I'm all for comfort over fashion, but is this comfort I'm going for or safety in disguise?
We were standing in the kitchen of our holiday cottage on the Isle of Mull. My friend turned to me and asked:
"What would make your life even better?"
The tears that rose up were sudden and unexpected as I blubbed out in response, "Nothing. There isn't anything I want. Everything is perfect. Life is perfect. There isn't anything that could make this any better."
I meant it. And my response had absolutely nothing to do with what I had and didn't have in my life. A year earlier, the same question in a similar circumstance may have had me answer:
I want a boyfriend.
I want more money.
I want to travel more.
I want to grow my business and be more successful.
I want to be fitter.
Is it just me, or have you ever noticed that if you spend more than about five minutes looking something up on the internet, you wind up with about fifty gazillion bits of conflicting advice?
Is waking up earlier the key to unlocking your success or is it totally ok that you prefer to live your life a little on the later side?
Do you ever feel that maybe sometimes you're just asking for too much? That maybe you've got it wrong? That maybe what you're actually supposed to do is let go of the life that calls to you and find contentment with what is?
Do you ever feel like if it was meant to be then surely it would be easier by now and that maybe after all it's not possible for everyone and that maybe you're one of those people for which it's not possible?
Do you ever feel that way?
My friend asked the man, as he showed us the way over the hill towards the beach, "do you like living here?"
"Yes", he replied.
We waited for him to elaborate further but he remained silent. Apparently, he was done. And who could blame him? We'd asked a question and he'd given the necessary reply.
When he disappeared back over the hill to his garden, the three of us laughed about it, noting how it was such a good example of how both 'yes' and 'no' are complete sentences and it's only all the thinking we have around using them that way that causes us problems.
Even as I write these words and admit to you the vast amount of space some of my days contain, there's that slight, lingering sense of laziness. But it is only slight now. Because deep inside and from endless personal experience I know that the world's got it wrong.
We were taught that "good" was being busy and doing more; working hard and putting in the hours. And we were taught that taking time out, playing, creating, sitting doing nothing at all was selfish and self-indulgent. "Are you keeping busy?" is one of the questions I'm most frequently asked, as if keeping busy were a badge of honour. Success, certainly, required a great amount of doing.
I love bold, bright colours. A Springtime of lush greens, deep purples and vibrant yellows. And I love the delicate pastels of shells on the seashore. Soft relaxing greys, whites, pinks and blues.
I love hanging out in my yoga pants and I love the occasional opportunity to play the princess.
I'm all for the passionate, lustful kiss and the sweet sweetness of the gentlest brushing of lips.